Best Man's Speech - Help

I have to deliver a Best Man’s Speech at my bro’s wedding in a few days. If anyone can give me helpful advice or point me to some good sites with example speeches, I would really appreciate it. I googled as always but the sites that come up all seem to have speeches with largely the same content and a lot of the material is really corny.

Also I’d appreciate any general advice for the big day i.e. what I should and shouldn’t be doing.

Hehe I just had to do this two weeks ago. I basically winged it :o . Basically you thank the flowergirls and bridesmaids, everyone for showing up and then the evil begins. You pretty much tell embarassing/funny things about the groom, him being your brother, that should give you a lot of ammo. Finish up perhaps with some advice, congratulate them and wish them the best. And don’t do what I did when hugging the bride by making her spill some of her punch on her dress. Oopsies.
Hope that helps a bit.

i got my bros wedding coming up thankfully i’m only an usher. :slight_smile:

Quote some statistics about the divorce rate, wish them luck and walk away shaking your head.

They would all get a good laugh about it later of course.

Look at him and say “Oh remember that time in Bangkok when we got drunk and woke up with those hookers? What were their names again? Betty…Sandra was it? And…Kevin. Yeah that’s the one. And we couldn’t pay because we didn’t have any money left cos you spent the last of it on dope? Man…fun times. We won’t be seeing days like those again often. Did you actually manage to get that marriage to Silky Sandra anulled?..Anyway, best of luck to you two, have a pleasant honeymoon.”

So if you and your friend were with hookers “Sandra” and “Kevin”, he got Sandra, who did you get? :stuck_out_tongue:

I don’t know about online, I didn’t have much luck looking. We ended up getting the Complete Book of Wedding Toasts, of which I didn’t use the actual toast from, but it gave me a pretty good idea of what to say.

Good Luck, I’ll need mine as I’m the groom and the I’m only a couple of weeks out.

And one other thing, do the toast BEFORE you get too toasted, or the bride might hate you forever [!]

Lol, I think I’ll avoid stuff like that. Both families are really uptight religious sorts. That’s why I’m finding it hard to come up with decent material. Bride and groom have never been drunk or abroad to my recollection.

Did you really spill punch on the Bride :o?? That’s probably one of the worst things you can do at a wedding, especially if the mother-in-law helped make the dress. Yeah, I think I’ll avoid the hugging and stuff.

Haha, I actually thought about doing that for a brief second a while back. Not sure that would go down well either.

Another concern I have is I get nauseous after eating sometimes and more so because of nerves and the speeches are to be after the meal. So, does anyone know any barf prevention measures?

Thanks for the help so far guys.

So if you and your friend were with hookers “Sandra” and “Kevin”, he got Sandra, who did you get? :P[/quote]

Betty. Though Kevin was a nice chap. Good fashion sense.

Well, when I hugged her she kind of tilted her glass of punch a bit too much. Only a little was spilled :slight_smile:

osxrules, you’re the guy who’s always posting uber-long posts. You practically write russian novels in your posts. “The Complete osxrules” would be a very thick book by now, I’m sure. Do you really need help writing a speech? What can you say about your brother? Plenty I’m sure, you’ve got a lot to say about everything else. Good luck with your sister-in-law. :wink:

Yeah, I think you should go on about how great OSX is, you never let that slip by here, why at a wedding? :Z

As long as you slip in a mention of Blender, anything is fine with me. :stuck_out_tongue:


Lol, nice one Kansas. You’re right, I’m actually finding it hard making it concise as usual. I’ve read that it’s not very good to go on longer than about 10 minutes so I’m trying to pick out interesting points in their lives and personality quirks. I just have a bad memory when it comes to that sort of stuff.

BTW, I think I’ll need all the luck I can get with the in-laws - odd bunch they are. :wink:

Haha, now there’s a good idea. Most of the people going will be Windows users. Maybe I’ll just end with the phrase “Think Different, sleep with one of the bridesmaids instead”. They’ll get the idea. I think they’ve probably heard me bangin’ on about it long enough though and I piss them off when they come to me with all their problems like not being able to connect their laptop to their desktop via ethernet and I just laugh at 'em.

Actually, my speech is panning out o.k now. I’m just polishing it up. Strangely for me, I’ve got the beginning and end worked out - I just need them to tie together. I’ve still got a couple of days left so I reckon I’ll work something out. Then to worry about the delivery.

A few beers should help start the delivery. However it will also make the rest of it less ‘stable’ shall we say :slight_smile:

It really depends on a lot of things.

A few things to consider:

  • What is your relationship with your brother?
  • What is your relationship with his wife to be?
  • What is the “mood” you want to set?
  • What do you want your brother to remember a year from now?

You are the best man. Your primary concern is the groom. Your toast is FOR him. Everything you do at that wedding should be to honor him.

HOW you go about honoring him depends entirely on your relationship with him. Maybe a good chiding and joking about the past and giving him a hard time is a way to honor him. In most cases though, I don’t think that is the best way.

A year from now, when he’s looking back on his wedding day, do you want him to remember that you treated it like every other day? Or do you want him to be proud of his choice of a best man and remember the honor you showed him that day?

Again, it all comes down to how you relate to him. My older brother was my best man. He showed me tremendous honor by congratulating me on the conduct of my life up to that point, for overcoming some obstacles, etc. He brought up some humerous memories that were not demeaning, though slightly embarassing. He then greeted my future wife into our family and commended me to be as good a husband as I was a brother.

Again, that type of speech was honoring to ME. That may not be the same for YOUR brother.

I’d recommend keeping it clean also. Most weddings are all-ages, all-generation deals. I’d keep the language and story aspect of the speech clean. It’s one thing to embarass him, and an entirely different thing to dishonor him.

This will be a big day for him. Keep that in mind. By all means, celebrate his wedding with a few drinks… just don’t be the bestman who I saw at a wedding I catered once:

First of all, the bartender was mixing them exceptionally stiff. And the bar was completely open.

The bestman came by at one point while I was checking on some of the hotplates… he grabbed some slices of beef with his fingers, dipped it by hand into the gravy trough, ate it, licked his fingers, then shook them off in the gravy… reached for more meat, repeat… a few times.

Later he was dancing on top of a pool slide with a bottle of something in his hands. He slipped, slid off into the pool, the bottle shattered on the side of the pool and if there weren’t so many people around, he probably would have drowned.

Don’t be that guy.

Wow… that’s a lot more than I meant to say. haha… oh well, sorry for the overkill.

Well, that’s it over with. I didn’t actually manage to read penitentman’s advice beforehand unfortunately but I actually did everything he said anyway. Thanks for the input anyway.

I was pretty nervous the whole day. In the morning I normally feel a bit nauseous and that wore off a bit. Then came the nerves just before the speeches.

Because the speeches were after the meal, I hardly ate anything. Didn’t much like the courses anyway. But then when my speech came, I wasn’t really speaking loud enough as I don’t usually and the microphone wasn’t amplifying very well.

So, some of the furthest half of the room didn’t hear what I was saying but they are happy to get transcripts.

The important thing was that the wedding day went without any trouble and my brother and his wife were happy with the outcome.

Oh, and I mentioned Blender on a few occassions ;). There are a few graphics designers who are friends of the family.

Thanks again guys for your help.