Can't unwrap this mesh. Help?

I’ve spent about the last two days trying to figure out Blender’s interface, which really seems to just defy every universal UI convention I’ve ever seen, and the official manual wiki has been no help at all. I’ve finally got enough of the real basics down though that I have a basic start here but I am just 100% lost on the following:

What exactly are my options for selecting things? If I’m in edit mode, I’m just shift-right-clicking around vertex by vertex and I have the feeling there are better options out there.

How, exactly, do I do this whole UV unwrapping/painting thing? Seriously, I need step by step instructions, written for someone who is not at all familiar with any aspect of the interface here (like, don’t assume I even know which mouse button to use or what’s where in any menus), ideally with illustrations or something. I’ve tried following a few tutorials, but when I get to the actual “U -> Unwrap” step, nothing happens, so I’m clearly missing something.

The model I’m working with (attached) is horizontally mirrored, which is handy for tweaking it, but if I actually get to the point where I have textures or animation on here, is going to be a problem? If so, what do I do about it?

I eventually want to export all this to Unity, but the last time I tried I just ended up with a null object. Again, rather clueless on what file types I need to be importing and exporting exactly.

human_female_take_1.blend (368 KB)

Hello and welcome to the wonderful world of Blender!

When asking for help, if in an anger state, go out walk a little, take fresh air, maybe…
Blender is an amazing software piece, one could make some great works!

About your problem, “U -> Unwrap” step, nothing happens", just delete the “Render Result” name in the UV Editor “image name” field.
Your “unwrapp” will appear!
Add some more “seams”, maybe?..

You can model, or unwrapp in “mirror” mode, then its better to “apply” to do animation or export!
And read some Blender docs, of course!

Bye

Welcome to Blender, and Blender Artists!

Blender does take a bit to get used to, the UI is bizarre at times, but it does become second nature.

I’d say add some seams, and try again - If you head over to http://cgcookie.com/blender/get-started-with-blender/ they have some great video tutorials from everything about the UI, to VFX, to exporting to Unity and game engines.

Hope this helps - And we’ve all been frustrated with Blender, just do what OTO says, take a break, have a cup of tea or a night off, and when you come back to it, you’ll be feeling refreshed!

Ctrl+tab for mesh select mode.
ABC. A = select all/none, B = box select, C = circle select
Ctrl+LMB = lasso select
Alt+(shift+)RMB = select edge loop
Ctrl+alt+rmb in vertex & face select modes = select face loop
Ctrl+alt+rmb in edge select mode = select edge ring
W -> select vertex path or select menu -> vertex path = select shortest path between two selected vertices.
Tool shelf (T) has “edge select mode” drop down menu. If you set that to “tag seam”, you can add seams quickly in edge select mode by selecting edges with ctrl+RMB. If you select ones that are further apart, it tags the shortest path between them as seams.

And all other wonders the select menu provides.