courageous hot topic

[kids , you shouldn’t read this thread :no: , go play Mario on N64 instead]
Hi , since a lot of time, i wanted to ask [since the absolute majority of this forum are males] , we all know as males that women are attractive , not from the physical perspictive only , in general , i have a lot of Questions
for an 18 student [uni not school by the way] , if he is planing to get married on the 4th year of university , and get betrothal on 3rd year and in case he want to continue master … till professor after his mirrage , his wife , when a guy is 21~22 years old , what is the best age for his wife ? , would his life become better mentaly ? , life is not cool as much as i want ,study at uni have fun with collegues , play games all day , study a little and sleep , LOL
i am planing to get married after 3~4 years and seems that i can’t understand the priorities , which thing is more important
-look & voice [who agrees that the female’s voice is more important than the look ? :D]
-mental believes

  • etc …
    one another thing , does imaging doing it make it weaker , and why , in details :o

Not marrying at all would have its perks too, it’s not required and I don’t find same age girls as attractive as many other people (well, I used to until around 5 years ago)

Dude, you cant just plan your life like that. You should know that things like that just happen from no obvious reason.

Like what if you fall in love into some girl, but then you check your note book: “Damn, aint gonna happen coz that girl is year younger that I had planned!”.
Or what if you havent found anyone interesting by the day you were planning to get married, you just grab some random lady to the altar.

Just live more and think less :smiley:

Im not married or anything, but you have to play it by ear man.

Life isnt good, and love isnt as fun if its planned. Plans always fall apart anyway.

I dont know where I heard it, but Ive also noticed chicks dig spontaneity.

Me friend married well when young.
Me other friend married when old
Me not yet married yet.

thanks for your posts … :slight_smile:

does imaging doing it make it weaker

and what about this ? :o

This is coming from a non-philanthropist/psychiatrist, so don’t expect much.

Usually, over-imagining all of the outcomes of a cause leads to paranoia. If you imagine “all” of the outcomes of asking a girl out, you’re going to automatically end up with more bad effects than good ones (Unless you’re a born optimist). Most people’s minds think this way because of experience. Seemingly, more bad things happen in our lives than good ones (if you find yourself saying “why is it always me?!!, etc…”), but that is because we pay more attention to the bad things in our lives.

Good Luck,
~Turin

Important stuff: That you get along in day to day life, have compatable goals, and appreciate some of the same stuff, and that you respect whatever each other does for art / hobby / whatever. Not trying to get each other to convert religions by telling the other they’re going to go to $bad_afterlife is probably good too.

IMO, a spouse should be someone who you could hang out with all the time, best friends and all that, even if you were both married to other people.

personally, i do not want to marry.

as free_ality said, plans fail. you need to live life the way you want, not the way everyone else tells you to live. if you want to be with one person forever, do it. but if not, don’t feel bad for staying single (or unmarried). :]

and this is something others close to me need to understand.

kbot, tell them. : ]

Thanks Lua - I may just do that!

It’s either they like spontaneity and moderate “randomness” in decisions, or they just hate waiting to make decisions about things that never really mattered…

I’m not married, but in my parents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents great grandparents days, you could get married at 15 or somethin…I think.

So those guys didn’t plan anything, why should you?

you want to get married in 3 or 4 years? I guess the main question to ask is… any particular girl in mind? You need to have one (at least one) to get married. As for your other question, I think if you say to yourself “ok, the girl I want to marry will look like this and will like this and that and we’ll have this in common” will probably end up limiting your choices, and you’ll meet the girl of your dreams and never allow yourself to just go with it. Chances are, tho, that whatever it is you decide to do, one day some chick is gonna spill her coffee all over you and a year later you’ll end up married to her. That’s how these things work.

@ Star_Weaver: Congratulations. You’re the first person I’ve ever seen use a global variable to describe Hell.

As with Blender, your imagination can far exceed the reality of what you produce.

cor your the master papasmurf

i think it’s important that you just GET ALONG. have similar energy levels. similar ideas of fun. similar ideas of down time. also, similar goals in life (and dreams of social status).

the very LAST thing you want in your life is a woman who thinks you’re a loser and you have the bear the daily brunt of her disapproval and disappointment.

(one funny quote i heard in my travels - when a man marries, he choses a f buddy. when a woman marries, she choses a lifestyle… so just make sure you can provide what she expects or you’re gonna hate life)

finally, as a man (and regarding the f buddy part), i think it is more important than most people will admit that you are satisfied with the notion that you can f that for the rest of your life.


when it comes down to it, life ain’t magical. but if those non-magical things align, you’re good to go.

jin

LOL, here’s my plan
24- I will get married
25- I will have my first boy
26- Will buy a new bigger house
28- Switch to new industry for my job
31- Buy a holiday home
37- Mid life crisis
41- Retirement

I’m an aesthist so i’m against religious ceremonys.

But how does getting married change anything? Signing a piece of paper doesn’t really change priorities or how two people treat each other.

How will your life change in anyway it was before getting married? ut uh. it doesnt. Dont sweat over it.