english story (final version)

ok here is da story

The room is quiet as it is still early in the morning. It is completely dark inside except for the glowing red numbers of an alarm clock showing the time to be 6:29am. As the clock changes to 6:30 a terribly irritating alarm sounds. Greg groans, and painfully lifts himself out of bed, still tired from all the work he had done at school the day before. He ambled over to his desk to shut the alarm off. He then quickly pulls on the cleanest clothes he can find, grabs his bag and heads downstairs for some breakfast.

It is very quiet in the kitchen as the other members of his family drearily prepare breakfast for themselves, none of them very energetic this early in the morning.

“Sometimes I wish we lived closer to school so I wouldn’t have to wake up so early,” Greg thought to himself.

Around 30 minutes later Greg’s family and himself were seated in their new Audi, driving along 16th Street towards the school Greg attended, Washington International School.

As they pulled up to the school Greg grabbed all his gear and hopped out of the car. He waved a brief goodbye and walked to his locker. Putting all his stuff away and getting out the books he would need for his first few periods he headed off to his first class, Biology.

He walked up to his usual seat in the back where he and all his friends usually sat. This way they could talk during class without really being noticed too much by the teacher.

He and his friends were just starting to discuss how boring the other night’s homework had been when the Biology teacher walked in with a big evil grin on his face. This could only mean one thing. Greg and his friends looked at each other and in unison let out a loud groan, because they were having a pop quiz.

As soon as the pop quiz on enzymes was placed in front of him Greg knew he would fail this quiz. He didn’t know answers to ANY of the questions. This would ruin his chance of getting a good term grade and that was one of the most important things to him. Greg was really worried now and was trying to think if there was anyway out of his situation when suddenly his vision started to blur. The colors all started swirling together faster and faster. He frantically rubbed his eyes, desperately trying to correct whatever had happened to his eyes. Then there was only darkness. Greg couldn’t see anything. All of a sudden he heard a whooshing sound and felt like he was falling over the edge of a cliff.

Suddenly he woke up on the floor of his room, his alarm sounding in the background. He stayed perfectly still for a minute trying to figure out what had happened. It seemed as if it had only been a dream, but it felt so real. His thoughts were interrupted by his mom yelling from down the hall telling him to turn the alarm clock off before she was forced to rip it from the wall. Thoughts of his dream soon vanished as he began preparing for school.

However as he got into the car, Greg remembered his dream and decided to study his Biology notes, just in case.

He got to school feeling very confident, after all it had only been a dream and he was well prepared incase there was a quiz. He was a little late so he ran to his classroom and seated himself at the back with his friends. Greg and his friends chatted for a few minutes, but stopped when the biology teacher walked in holding some papers with a grin on his face. Greg having studied his notes on enzymes also smiled, feeling very prepared for the pop quiz he had been forewarned about in his dreams.

The teacher was passing out the papers and as a copy of the quiz was placed on his desk in front of him, his smile instantly disappeared. Greg was almost ready to scream because the quiz was not about enzymes at all but instead about DNA. He had prepared for one quiz only to be surprised by a different one all together. Greg hoped that maybe this would end up being another dream. However by the end of the class when he received his quiz back with a big, fat red ‘F’ on it he knew this was no dream.

He was walking out of the class feeling very sad that he had ruined his perfect grade average when the biology teacher called out to Greg, “Don’t worry about that pop quiz it was just to see how much you knew, it won’t be graded. See you later.”

Greg’s face lit up with a smile, now he was glad this was not a dream.

You are using way too long sentences.

The room is quiet as it is still early in the morning. It is completely dark inside except for the glowing red numbers of an alarm clock showing the time to be 6:29am.

Revised:

Early in the morning, in a quite room, the lights of an alarm clock glowed dimly in the dark.

Don’t tell us what is happening, make us feel it.

Vulcankid: Good luck with your story! For some reason it inspired that little reinterpretation :P.

Cheers,

b01c

what the crap is going on here!?

what the crap is going on here!?

Traitor, you took the words right out of my… behind…

A tad unusual for a story, would make a great story if it was in a collection of kid stories.