well…ill save you some time on searching (ive been strugling the past few months with this alot)
the curly thing, you can do like fligh said. the curves can also be used for this. to do this with the curves add a bezier curve or path, then go to force fields and set it to curve guide. you can then shape the curve to make the hair deform like the curve.
to animate is a bit more complicated…but still easy
make the curve a softbody like fligh said and set a weight on one of the vertices (with ‘w’ key in edit mode), if you set the gravity of the softbody to around about 3.5, and the same with friction and set the speed to about 7, you can get a realistic hair movement (it will fall to the ground as it follows the curve guide)
to do the wind: create an empty and then apply force field to it (wind). you can then bring it closer to the curve so it affects it (but keep away from particles, they act weirdly)
to create a more windy effect go to the ipo of the empty and go to ‘fstrength’ add a curve (i think its ‘shift + click’) and make a wavy pattern (anything will do, as long as the strewngth of the wind changes the whole time) and make the curve repeat itself