No, this post is not about narcotics. The title is from Hewey Lewis’ song of the same name, in which he proclaims that he needs some source of thrill and enjoyment to take the place of the woman (presumably) that he has lost; “something that makes me feel like I feel when I’m with you”.
Also, this is my debut writing under a secret identity. I do this because I have times in my life when I need to be whiny and pathetic, and I would not want to taint my otherwise sleak and stylish image on these boards with that. So yes, in true internet tradition, I am using the identity of RantMan as my cloak of anonymity! :RocknRoll: I will use it in the future for even more technosocial commentary and creative madness (including on 3D topics, of course!) that no self-respecting oerson would have the courage to do under his or her own name!
But anyway… I have not lost the love of my life, but Mr. Lewis’ song-title does fit my current predicament. I have been searching for some time for something that I can hang my obsessive consumption of information and entertainment on. I recently closed the final chapter on roleplaying games. They simply do not do it for me anymore like they did before. I still read the books, but they seem to read like the same thing over and over again. I watch various TV series, too, like Heroes, House MD, 4400, CSI, and such things. Once Galactica starts up again, I will also continue with that. But they are brief moments of increasingly limited thrills, as the formulas driving the writers become apparent. I have more or less given up on reading fiction, after the last few highly praised works I read left me feeling a bit cheated. The only two writers that can really fulfill my growing needs seem to be H.P.Lovecraft, whose short works are chaotic and confusing enough to keep my attention, and Douglas Adams, whose entire line of works I have sadly already read (including the work he left unfinished at his untimely death, The Salmon of Doubt). I also watch Anime (currently D-Gray), but it, too, seems to have become repetitious, most titles falling neatly into a specific category and simply rehashing that formula over again.
I need something to get my brain-juices flowing again. Something strange and unusual, something that can inspire me. I have tried computer games, but since I completed Civ 2 on Deity level and closed the door on Starcraft Broodwar, I have not found anything remotely innovative. I have tried WoW and grown bored quickly of running around whacking the various critters (alone or with friends), and the various first-person-do-somethingers look more and more like Wolfenstein with snazzy graphics.
So I am hoping that someone in here can tell me “RantMan, there is something out there that is completely different, something full of experiences and with strange things to learn, something complicated and yet deeply inspiring”. In my civilian identity, I have grown to respect the wide knowledge of people in here, and hope that this is where I will find that sage to point me to my new ‘drug’. Something that inspires the inquisitive, analytical part of me, and yet tickles the inner child with artistic thrill and pretty colors.
My latest thrill was a webcomic named Dresden Codak, which is sufficiently weird, yet somehow meaningful and beautifully executed. I went through it in two days. I also read standard books at 40-50 pages per full days reading, and easily go through half a dozen movies on a slow sunday, so I have very much brought my lack of new things to consume upon myself.
My only current option seems to be to create somehting new on my own, and that of course was what originally brought me to Blender, and continues to drive my civilian identity. But there is a lack of satisfaction in entertaining yourself. It is my humble hope that this thread will bring me new ways to enjoy things viewed outside my own head 
Oh yeah, I did that ‘real world’ thing too. Most of it is highly overrated, especially the whole party scene :no:
