More realistic hair using particle system?

Ive been messin around with the particle system to make hair. however it hasnt been going asw well as i have hoped, the hair looks decent enough, but is there anyway to make it have a more “realistic” look to it? that and, when i render thses “eyelashes” that ive made and applired to planes, they just show up as planes in the render

Id also like an overall opinion of this face…im trying to make something along Final Fantasy Quality models… im a noob, but ive been workin at it all summer i think ive come a long way.
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/1007/eyesjz.jpg

come to think of it, the eyelash ting is more of a texture problem…so ill make a thread about it there. But id still like help with the hair please n thanks.