Ton, do you really want to be blond?

(IngieBee) #1

I mean, look at what happened to her!


She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde …

She thought a quarterback was a refund.

She thought General Motors was in the Army.

She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

She thought Boyz II Men was a day-care center.

At the bottom of an application where it says “sign here,” she wrote

She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde…

She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

She sent a fax with a stamp on it.

She thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.

She thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.

Under “education” on her job application, she put"Hooked On Phonics".

She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde…

She tripped over a cordless phone.

She spent 20 minutes looking at an orange juice can because it said>

She told someone to meet her at the corner of “WALK” and “DON’T WALK.”

She asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

She tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order.

She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde…

She studied for a blood test.

She thought she needed a token to get on “Soul Train.”

She sold her car for gas money.

When she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice.

When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she
turned around and went home.

She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde…

When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

She thought Taco Bell was Mexico’s phone company.

She thought that if she spoke her mind, she’d be speechless.

She thought she could only use her AM radio in the morning.

She had a shirt that said “TGIF,” which she thought stood for “This Goes In>
Front” ~

(pofo) #2

ROFL! :smiley: :stuck_out_tongue:

That’s the biggest collection of blonde jokes I’ve seen.

Would you happen to be blonde since you’ve heard so many? :wink:

  1. pofo

(gargola) #3

he he he he he he! good jokes Ingie! :wink: :smiley: :smiley: :smiley:

(IngieBee) #4

LOL no, my aunt just sent those, she’s blond (or was, LOL) and my best friend is blond.

My friend and I work in the same office and one day I hear her talking to a guy who was confused. She said " Oh don’t worry, you’re just having a blond moment, I get them all the time!" LOL

Now, she may know all of em.

(cree) #5

What do you call an intelligent blonde?

A golden retriever.

(Friday13) #6

LOL!!! Those jokes are hilarious!

(IngieBee) #7

Three girlfriends, one a blond, go out for drinks every Friday night. Every Friday night, at the bar, they see the same group of guys who crack “blond jokes” in their direction all night. One Friday night, the blond confesses that it really bothers her that they crack those jokes, and she’d really like to get even with them. So her two friends give her a plan. For the next week, she should study United States’ State Capitals, and next Friday, she can challenge them to a duel to see who can list the most state capitals.

The blond spent the next week studying and memorizing, and finally, Friday comes along. There at the bar, the same guys were in their corner cracking blond jokes from the moment the girls walked in. So the blond walks up to them and says, OK buddy, you think you are so smart, how about a duel? Lets see who can come up with the most state capitals??

The burly leader of the group says, ok, you go first!

So the blond answers, Fine! Texas, Capital “T”!

(cree) #8

What do you call kinky candies? … S&M&M’s

(Grizzly69) #9

Here’s a good one.

A blonde was so tired of people thinking she was dumb that she dyed her hair brunette went out to prove otherwise. While out at a gas station she sees a semi-truck full of sheep and decides to show someone, anyone, she was smart. So she aproaches the driver at the pump and starts talking to him. She convinces him to give her a sheep if she can guess how many there were in the truck with just a quick glance.

He flips open the back door, she glances, and says “45”. The trucker is amazed and tells her to take a sheep. Just as she is about to leave, the trucker says “Hey lady! If I can guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?”

(Dittohead) #10


Is this better?:

(IngieBee) #11

LOL, make it red and he’ll have my heart!!! LOL

Hey, it’s not for blonds per se, but most swedes are… so here goes, another group to hate me, but it’s too funny!!!

Vun day, Sven vas valking down da street ven who

did he see driving a

brand new Chevrolet? It vas Ole. Ole pulled up to him

vit a vide smile.

“Ole, vere did you get dat car?” Sven asked

“Lena gave it to me”

"She gave it to you? I knew she vas sveet on

you, but dis?"

"Vell, let me tell you vat happened.

Ve vere driving out on county road 6, in da

middle of novere. Lena pulled

off da road into da woods. She parked, got out of da

car, trew off all of her

clothes and said "Ole take vatever you vant.

" … So I took da car"

"Ole, you’re a smart man, dem clothes never

voulda fit ya."

(cree) #12

self- censored

(pofo) #13

Why didn’t the first sister raise the ladder?

Kinda mean :wink:

(cree) #14

She wanted to see what her sister would do.

(IMProvisar) #15

Maybe she had blonde hilights. :wink:


(CubeFan973) #16

Um, whatever.

Yuck. Someone censor that stuff about horse ****.

Otherwise, this is rather silly. Blondes aren’t always that dumb. All right, they mostly are, but still…

(cree) #17

They should censor the hate someone flame war first, if you are going to censor anything. That thread is more mindless than this one.

(CubeFan973) #18

Yeah, you’re right. Go through the flame war thread and censor everything! Rename it “censored post, ignore it” and lock it down! Or better yet, delete the whole thing! I’m actually ashamed that I replied (minus those threads on Monty Python)!

(cree) #19

Well, I didn’t want to offend you with the crude jokes. I apologize for offending you. You’re right, stereotyping blondes or anyone else for that reason can be funny for some people and offensive for others. It’s fine balancing act between political correctness and being tasteless. I think I was being tasteless… sorry.

(gargola) #20

come on guys! this are just jokes…i found them very funny.Ingie just wanted to share a good laugh with us. :smiley: