Working on my first CGI animated short film - require feedback

Artwork Works in Progress
1

Hi everyone,

Im currently working on my first fully CGI animated short film. Its a project that is very dear to me and that I have already worked on for quite a while, though Im just really getting started on the creation of the shots.

Most of the assets for the movie are created using Blender, so I do believe it has its place here and that its alright that I ask for feedback on these forums.

Important to know about me is that I am a filmmaker first and a CGI artist second. Meaning I learned CGI animation to make movies, not the other way around. This also means that Im equally, or even more interested in the critique of the cinematography of my work and not just the overall CGI quality.

This also means that my CGI quality currently might not be as incredible as that of some other artists on this forum, however, my goal is to create CGI of a quality that makes the movie really work from a storytelling perspective and that makes the viewer go “yep, thats real/legit CGI, alright”.

In this thread, I will post screenshots and maybe even sometimes the entire animated shots (Rendering takes a LONG time though) and I would really appreciate it if you guys could give me a suggestions how they could be improved. This is my first fully CGI animated movie, so the shots are not necessarily perfect and they surely could use to be looked at by a more experienced CGI artist/cinematographer than me.

What I would like you to give me feedback on specifically:
Overall Cinematography - Lighting - Compositing - Overall CGI quality

The more indepth, the better!

Short info on the movie:
The movie will be a rather abstract sci-fi short film that will be driven by a consistent music piece and will feel similar to a montage, even though it is not by definition. I wont go into too much detail of what exactly the movie will be in order to not spoil anything. However, I do have a very strong vision for it. I do know that its usefull for proper critique of work if you know the whole context, though I do feel it would be alittle excessive in this case and again, I dont want to spoil too much.

With all that said, I hope you can give me some feedback! It would be very much appreciated!

(You can right-click on the pictures and choose “show in new tab” (or “show image” or something, depending on your browser) to view them in full-screen, btw.)

Shot 1:
The first shot of the movie. A space scene. Glowing cubes will be floating in until they completely cover the screen, as the camera starts to rapidly move backwards.

My questions:

  • Does the overall space background feel “right”?
  • Do the cubes feel properly integrated into the shot? Do they have a proper presence?
  • What do you think of the color grading?

Shot 2:
A continuation of the last shot (basically Shot 1 and 2 are one long tracking shot). The camera follows the cubes until they form into this female-like beeing. Again, the camera moves backwards,
meaning initially the beeing is more in the foreground, as it gets formed.

Notes:
The color-grading and VFX work (like particles) in this shot arent necessarily finished yet, though the coming tweaks to those should be relatively minor.

My questions:

  • How is the lighting, especially of the female beeing? Does it properly convey drama and is it interesting?
  • Does the composition of the shot properly draw the female beeing into focus or does she sort of get lost in the background?
  • What do you think of the light fog/smoke surrounding the beeing?
  • Again, what do you think of the color grading?
  • Does the pose of the beeing look good?
  • Does it come across that the beeing is slightly smiling? (In screenshot 2?)
  • Please judge the overall composition and cinematography of this shot.

My inspiration:
My cinematography style is very much inspired by the likes of Michael Bay and Zack Snyder and very much adhering to the principle that through the cinematography each shot should strongly express emotions and support the themes and atmosphere of the movie. The cinematography alone should imbue the movie with value, meaning and substance. I like to call it “substance through style” - atleast thats what im striving towards when it comes to my cinematography.

Heres a good piece and a big inspiration and reference for my current CGI work and reading it should help those that want to give me the most valuable of feedback understand better with what Im striving for with this movie (though I dont expect anyone to put that much effort into giving feedback and thats ok). Though I think everyone that is interested in cinematography or CGI, and especially CGI cinematography, should read this article, as its one of the best on the topic I have ever found:

Thanks alot for reading and I hope to get some usefull feedback! I do very much appreciate it! I will post updates when I have more to show!

2

Here’s my take on this. As far as quality goes, it’s pretty good. For the Nebula, if that’s what it is, it looks fine to me. I didn’t know what the cubes were or its purpose until I read the second part.

Now for the second part, the enigmatic being was my focal point. It kind of had a feeling of Mystique from the X-Men comics minus the hair. The pose is fine since it was on one of the lines of thirds. The being does not look like it is smiling since I have no idea if this is organic or artificial or not.

Overall, this is some very quality work you’ve done. Beaten me by light years.

3

Hi, this looks intriguing. For the first shot, the color/space background looks nice. I was put off immediately by the cubes. They standout as too “fake” against the background. My suggestion is to darken them up quite a bit and give them some light variation - as if sunlight is hitting them from a specific angle. I think this will help integrate them into the shot.
The second shot, this ‘being’ is great. Stands out, draws interest, nice pose. I cannot tell of any smiling, but not able to click on the pic and zoom in or anything. Looking forward to more!

4

Without seeing this in motion it is hard to say, however the cubes are the weakpoint right now.
They are too bright and seem not to react to the illumination provided by the environment. I also think they are oversaturated compared to the rest of the shots, it will break the visual continuity if they transition into shot 2 (which is well done, at least from the stills)

5

First of all, thanks alot for all the feedback already! Im very glad the overall opinion seems to be that the quality is good and that it already starts to intrigue people. I especially like that the second shot seems to be received very well.

I expected that the cubes would be seen as a weakpoint, though they are a tricky subject. Keep in mind that they are supposed to be glowing like a lightbulb though. How do you properly integrate a brightly glowing object into a space scene like that without it standing out too much? Any ideas?

Like dvnobles suggested, I will try to somehow make the cubes be more affected by the overall light in the scene (at the moment the first shot indeed does not have a light source as I didnt think it would be necessary, but we will see).

As for why the cubes should glow, its because it makes for a magnificent transition in motion in the second shot when they form into the beeing and smoothly change their materials from glowing to a sort of metal look.

This doesnt come across well in pictures but case in point (turned motion blur partially off and depth of field off for this because of that render time):

http://i.imgur.com/6vIElw3.png
6vIElw3.png1920×1080

You can right-click on pictures and choose “show in new tab” (or “show image” or something, depending on your browser) to view them in full-screen, btw.

What exactly the beeing is made out of (and the cubes) is supposed to be purposefully ambiguous.

Also, one thing I should mention is that I cant take into account all feedback, even though I do read and appreciate every contribution. I try to work on this movie on a relatively organized and fast schedule, meaning I cant take everything into account and especially larger changes might just not be feasible in a reasonable timeframe.

I will try and tweak the cubes though, I feel like they are definately something that could be improved the most at the moment.

6

Shot 1
The space background feels right.
The cubes are not properly integrated, I would try keeping them in the same colour hue as the background. Due to their shape, they stand out anyway.
If you want them to glow, try an emission material with a proper gradient texture (I suppose the cube would be brighter on the inside of the faces, than on the edges and corners, like this but smoother http://image.dhgate.com/0x0/f2/albu/g2/M00/3E/91/rBVaG1ZOh86Aa5z6AABvu3Yb3NE598.jpg ).

Shot 2
Maybe try a stronger rimlight, that feels more dramatic.
The character has a skinning problem in the knee, the legs feel too flat and thin.
The character’s look is directed out of frame (but I guess as you’re a filmmaker, that’s intentional and has some story purpose?)
I don’t see her smiling.

Haven’t read the other comments, so sorry if I’m repeating something already said.

7

For the space background, I’d add a little more color variation in the smaller stars and crush the darks a bit. Personal preference, that’s all. Also, are you using filmic Blender? If not, it might help.

8

Thanks everyone, the feedback has been great so far.

Seeing how I want to keep working on this movie on a decent pace, Ive chosen to so far address the two most current mentioned issues.

Ive tried to integrate the cubes into the shot more by making them less bright, less saturated aswell as having them affected by the light within the scene (which however, is barely a visible change). I think it already looks alot better. What do you think?

I think for the first shot, its important to really nail the FIRST cube that comes into vision, seeing how all the other cubes will go by more quickly.

However, even when alot of cubes come into view now they do look better now. In the last stage in the production of the shots, as soon as most elements are rendered, I will use more moving lens-flares once things get really crazy to more properly blend the thousands of cubes with the background space scene.

Aside from that, I have to say Im satisfied with the results of the first shot now.

One last thing though: Ive played around with the overal materials of the cubes and came up with this result, I guess it looks alittle bit more detailed and “real” now?:

Do you like it more or less than this?

As for the second shot.

Ive gotten some good feedback when it comes to the lighting of the shot, however, I do believe I shouldnt change the lighting of the shot at this point anymore as I do want to move on to the next shot (However, I might still change it later on, just not now). However, I will definately keep the lighting advice in mind for the coming shots!

Instead, Ive focused my final attention of the second shot on another point:

Alot of people said they cant see the smiling, which I think is a more pressing issue than the lighting, seeing how its a key point of the shot. As such, Ive created a version where the smiling is abit more pronounced. Please compare these two images and tell me if you can see the smiling alittlebit more clearly in the first one.

It should just be a subtle, confident smirk, nothing big. The stronger version:

1920×1080 304 KB

The older, less strong version:
1920×1080 303 KB

Seeing how this might just come across better in motion, Ive rendered out this section of the shot as a pre-visualisation shot (so no good lighting, vfx and so on). Does the slight smirk come across in motion or is it absolutely terrible?:

Camera movement in this particular render is also not fully realized, it really is just to show off the animation on the beeing.

This might also be a good time to judge the movement of the beeing - though keep in mind I wont change it anymore for THIS shot, but your feedback will be kept in mind for the shots to come. As for this shot, I will only try to improve the smirking for now.

Anyways, looking forward to what you think!